Sterling + Demi = 1 Heart

The popular saying "Pinch me I'm dreaming" should be changed to "Pinch me I'm dreaming but if I'm not dreaming then don't you dare wake me up cause I'm loving this dream" cause right now I hope and pray that I'm not dreaming. I feel like I'm in my very own heaven and have been for the past 4 years; I mean what person wouldn't be in heaven knowing that they get to see the women that they have dreamed about meeting ever since they were little boys every day of their lives.

Ok so maybe that was just me cause I'm pretty sure that growing up all little boys thought about were impressing their friends' with doing stupid, immature and sometimes really dangerous stunts and pranks that is suppose to show how "brave" and "tough" they are. Well ok so to be honest I was one of those little boys who did things that I should have known would get me either seriously hurt or grounded by my parents but I still did them, not to the same extent as my friends who were always daring the others to up their own pranks and stunts or they would be labebeled as "chicken".

Plus like any other little guy I was under the impression that girls had cooties that I could get from touching them let alone letting them kiss my check which the little girls made a game of chasing the boys around the yard threatening to kiss them with lips puckered and smacking as a threatening tool. When they did catch the unspecting victim, the group of girls would gang up on him, a couple of them would hold the boy down while two girls would smother his plumb checks with loud smacks while the boy loudly protested at the "grossness" of what was happening to them. Oh by the way my mom or sister didn't count as "girls" cause to my young, innocent mind they didn't count as girls, to me they were my mommy and sissy.

But growing up seeing how much my parents still loved each other even after a number of years of being married and still acted all lovey dovey, like they were still newlyweds must have set my mind up for finding a girl when I was an adult that I could be as happy and loving with even if I did think that my parents kissing, calling each other cutsey, loving and sometimes corny endearments like "babe", "baby", "tooties" and "babycakes"and my dad still slapping my mom's butt and kissing her neck as he held her close was gag-worthy just like any other children gagged and made a huge fuss about their parents being gross in public.

I could say that my past relationships were huge mistakes cause most of the girls I have dated have been manipulative, vain, selfish and using me for my fame and popularity with the public for their own gain. They have been beautiful on the outside, I won't deny that fact cause it would be pointless, but man have they been ugly on the inside. From the way they unceremoniously dumped me either by texting me that its over or me having to hear that they had moved on to another relationship from the magazines and gossip TV shows instead of hearing it from my supoosed girlfriend, they weren't the women I needed in my life but they did make a good contribution to my list of "My Dream Women's Qualities" so I guess it wasn't all bad.

I never believed in "Love at First Sight" like all romance novels write about that all the female readers go gaga and dreamy-eyed dreaming of the day when their very own Prince Charming will come into their lives, sweep them off their feet and love them as deep and truthfully like the heroes in the stories where the hero and heroine live happily ever after madly in love. It's like every women's dream to have that happen in their lives, it seems to be the only reason they read romance novels besides the obviously intriguing plotlines.

Like I said before, I never used to believe in love at first sight, that is until I met my dream girl and best friend of the last wonderful 4 years, Demi Lovato. I'm totally serious about the whole "love at first sight" thing, It took one look into those pools of melted milk chocolate that you could just drown in if you had the privilage of having the time to gaze deep into them and when you look into Demi's beautiful eyes you can see deep into every corner of her soul to see what deep dark secrets she has been hiding from even the people she deemed worthy of being in her life as the people she loves and cares for deeply.

Plus looking into her eyes, you can see every emotion she has for every moment life brings her so you can pretty much tell how Demi is feeling by looking into her eyes which is always nice for any guy cause then if he by chance angered the women of his dreams he can work his tail off to get back on her good side cause no guy likes being on his dream girls' bad side cause that can only cause turmoil in both of their lives.

I met Demi at the 1st table reading of "SWAC" and it was love at first sight, I can't tell if it was her gorgeous, million watt smile that melts your heart, her laughter that rings out like bells and makes you want to do anything in order to hear that laughter again, even if it's only a giggle,or her sweet,adorablness that makes you want to go aww at whenever she says or does, caring, genuine, down to earth, hilarious personality that made me melt into the floor a little, forget what I was suppose to say and make my brain stop sending signals to my mouth to say something smart or at least cool and my hand to take back my hand from where it laid in the small, delicate, fragile, ivory hand of an angel.

So when I first met Demi, I was the biggest dork that I knew by my mouth hanging wide open complete with drool running down the side of my mouth, eyes bugged, and nothing comprehensive coming out, I'm surprised that Demi didn't look at me like I had a few screws loose though it's not in her good nature to be rude or crude to anyone whether they are the biggest dorks or losers, she will just smile her most serene and gentle smile at them and talk to them in her gentle.patient, understanding, sweet voice that makes you feel like a million bucks or the most important person in the world.

It didn't take long for me to fall even deeper in love with Demi as our friendship got deeper and more intricate. I would go for walks around the set in order to find Demi and hopefully presuade her to spend time with me, cause if she did then my life will become so much sunnier (hahaha I made a pun) and funnier. Even if it's hanging out at lunch with our friends with everyone talking at once, as long as I'm sitting in the presence of my angel,am staring into her beautiful chocolate eyes, listening to her angelic, melodic voice as it floats over the crowds and the bustle of said crowd and breathing in the very essence that makes Demi my Dem Demi, if I'm with Demi, I'm happy.

Our loving friends have said that I'm not exactly subtle when it comes to my true feelings for Demi, I mean I have seen every movie she's in even when I with my friends who tease me mercilessly that I'm watching a baby movie because of a chick, note a hot chick, but still a chick even though I shrug off their teasing, cause all I focus on is Demi and all she says and does on screen. Demi's music is on repeat on my MP3 player, I have to listen to her songs everyday and when its on, the rest of the world melts away until I feel each lyric and melody in my heart and soul so that I feel it in my bones. Pretty much whenever I see Demi, either on screen or in person my heart races out of my chest, my palms become lakes, my tongue becomes a tangled mess and my brain and the rest of my body seem to stop communicating so that I'm forever seen around my angel as a stumbling, bumbling and dorky young man who can't say one complete sentence without stumbling over my words and my feet.

I won't say that I wasn't totally bummed,stressed, worried and emotional sick when Demi dated those jerks, manipulative,vain, womanizer "little boys"", they aren't deserving to be called men because even though they were men in age, they weren't in their maturity and emotional standing, real men would make their own descions and not let other people decide what they should do and say like when they were children and wouldn't hurt or use someone as talented and sweet as Demi to boost their dying or obsolute talent or career instead of just working hard to boost their own fame.

I hated opening magazine covers and see my sweetie with other men being all affectionate with them and know in my heart that the only right men for her was me, I was her soulmate and she was mine ( I knew it from the moment I laid eyes on her as something in my heart told me "This is the woman you are gonna marry"") I would treat her not only as a Princess but as a human being with real feelings and her own thoughts and opinions that need to be listenned to, taken into consideration and followed as much as my own. I'm the type of guy who isn't afraid to show the girl in his life how special she is to me and how much I love,adore and worship her whether in public or privately, as long as the women knows the extent of my feelings, I'm happy.

I was so happy when the producers of "Sonny with a Chance" decided that after a year and a half of "Sonny" and "Chad" flirting-bantering all the time with Chad having moments where he says or does sweet things for his lady that makes her think "Hmm maybe this arrogant jerkward isn't as bad as I thought. he actually can be thoughtful and sweet", he made it so that Demi and mine characters started dating. I have never been so happy, I actually jumped up and down, screaming like a banshee, and hugged the producer, director at the studio and my mom and sister at home like an idiot but I am in an idiot in love when I was told of the amazing news.

I adored being able to hold the women of my dream's hand, her soft, delicate, silky little hand that sent shivers down my spine everytime we touched even for a second, hold her small, delicate yet strong, lithe, soft body in my arms that also makes me melt into the floor and makes me feel like I'm holding heaven in my arms whenever I'm holding Demi in my arms, even if it's only a brief hug, and of course I can't forget how I feel when Demi's soft, supple, plumb lips that just beg to be kissed and carassed by someone plus I swear they have a tractor beam that pulls unspecting victims to feel a piece of heaven by kissing those lips and I have a strong feeling that I will be the only one who has the privilage and honor to kiss Demi in the years to come.

I still can't believe that I got to do all the actions I described above on the show, though I'm hoping that when Demi and I do get together, God willing, Demi and I don't go through the horrible, heart-wrentching break-up like "Sonny" and "Chad" even though "Chad" should have seen the break-up coming after he wasn't happy that his lady got the recognition she and her castmates obviously got and that he wasn't the "main star" anymore and got a re-call but his efforts lost him the women who could have been his soulmate. I hope that I never do anything that bad or terrible that will lose me my very own soulmate, if I lost Demi, I would become a blubbering,mess, shell of myself where I wouldn't talk to anyone but stay in my room in a ball and alternate between crying, yelling at myself for being so idiotic to do something that I made me lose my one true love and praying that this is a dream and that when I wake up I will still have Demi in my life.

One of my favorite nicknames for her is angel and it's true cause I feel she is an angel who came to Earth to teach people who feel like they are superior to everyone else because either of the talents they have or think they have, how prominent in the community their family are or they were just raised with the entitlement of getting everything they want from others, that everyone is made equal and even though some people have more opportunities to get ahead in life because they have a more outgoing, personable personality then others and works hard to get their dreams fulfilled, that doesn't give them the right to badmouth or talk down to other people.

I feel Demi was born to make the world a safer place for people who are considered "different" even though that is what made the world special and fun, the fact that millions of people from different ethics group, financial backgrounds,sexual orientations and some people who have ranges of disabilities intermingling in one planet. She was in this world to try to stop people from hurting, either physically, mentally or emotionally others and to learn how to live civil with everyone they met, no matter if they like the other person or not.

Another life lesson that Demi was born to teach the world that no matter what terrible situations or descions a person makes in their lives, it may seem like a travesty at the time like the world will end and their lives are destroyed and it might take awhile but overall things will go from gloomy to sunny side up once again. She teaches people that no matter what happens, everyone has some sort of support system in their lives consisting of family, close friends and other professionals in the community who will support and love them as they journey to reclaim their life after learning the lesson that their descions weren't in their own best interest and they need to make better choices.

I still can't believe that my sweet angel was bullied in elementary school so badly that she started to doubt her worth and value to the world and would come home crying that no one in that school liked her, I knew that children can be cruel if their parents didn't teach them to treat others the way themselves would want to be treated but doing a petition saying how many people didn't like my sweetie, calling her mom to say that they wouldn't care if Demi died, (hey there are some people who do care if Demi dies cause we love her very much plus the world would be missing an angel) and doing all other mean stuff that I won't trouble you with cause I don't like to bring up unpleasant memories, just because my sweetie wasn't exactly a stick thin little girl.

I have seen many episodes of "Barney and Friends" cause I heard Demi telling Tiffany that she pretended "Pauley" was "Barney" and how she would react to meeting him as a little girl in the episode where "Sonny" meet "Pauley" so of course if it has something to do with my sweetie then I have to watch it. Anyway I have seen little Demi and man if I met her as a child I think I would have gotten over my idea that girls had cooties and totally would have had a major crush on her cause she was so darn adorable and just screamed "I'm huggable so please put your arms around me and squeeze" and I'm so glad that her gorgeous smile didn't change too much, just a gap filling dental surgury to get rid of the gap between her two front teeth that I thought gave her character.

I know that Mrs and Mr Lovato tried their hardest to raise a strong-willed, caring, loving independant women but only Demi knew what was in her heart; that because of what her mean, immature and manipulative classmates about not liking her because of her weight, she stopped eating the three main meals and started working out excessively, sweetheart you must have known in your heart of hearts that what you were doing was unhealthy to your body. I always thought that you were one of the most beautiful woman I know, both inside and out; I think you have the right amount of "fat" or curves on your body that makes you look healthy and fit and be a wonderful roke model for young girls who aren't liking what puberty is doing to their bodies.

When Demi finally came out that she had emotional and physcial problems that she had to deal with, all her friends and family were shocked that we had never seen the warning signs that Demi was hiding such a big thing from the people she should have known she could trust, the people who always will love her and support her no matter what she says or does, we would have helped her earlier to achieve the inner peace and serenity 3 months in a treatment centre complete with lots of hugs, kisses, love and support that she got from her family, close and true friends and of course her loyal and true fans got her.

And we couldn't be any more proud of her achievements and her success of getting back the life she deserves and wants, my heart swells evertime I read her loyal and true fans' supportive and loving tweets about how much they adore, love and treasure Demi and all her works with Pacer, so that no child has to go through the pain, humliation and degraduation of being bullied on their self esteem, and her work with "Seventeen" magazine, the only girlie magazine I will ever buy cause it has my sweetheart's pearls of wisdom that only someone either older then Demi's age or someone who has been through a lot of things in her life and has immense experience and knowledge that she wants to share with everyone who will listen.

Ok so I'm starting to get depressed; I'm writing this journal entry in hopes that I can express my undying love for my girlfriend, the women of my dreams, my soulmate and as said before, the women I have dreamed about meeting and marrying ever since I could remember. Which brings me to the other main reason I'm writing this journal entry; tonight I'm taking a huge step I am going to ask Demi if she wants to go on a date with me; today I'm going to gather up all my courage and manhood and finally after 4 long years of my loving family and friends bugging me that I'm obvious in how I feel for Demi and could I please ask her out already so they don't have to listen to me gushing about Demi's many wonderful qualities, how much I wish she loves me as much as I love her and how I wish she was mine almost all day. They love me but hearing me go on and on about Demi all the time is egging on their last nerve.

I'm nervous yet excited; I know this is a huge step but I think I'm ready for this new step in fulfilling my dreams of winning the heart of my future wife and the women of my dreams; I know that Demi said that one of her dreams is to be a wife and mother but she's still too young for marriage even if she's at the legal age to marry but she needs to live life the way she wants and follow her own dreams before she will ever be ready to settle down because I want her to be just as assured and 100% certain about this life-long descion about marrying me as I know that I am; if Demi says "marry me" tommarrow I will not hesitate to say yes even if our parents disown us and force us apart, as long as it's Demi and me spending our lives together for eternity, I'm happy.

I have it all planned out; I will go to Demi's house dressed up in my causual clothes or a dress shirt with nice slacks and a small bouquet of tea roses and when she answers the door with her gorgeous smile, I will look her deep into her beautiful, chocolate eyes and try not to stutter, mumble, or trip over my own words as I ask her to come to my place for a home cooked meal complete with dancing to my CD collection of oldies (70's and 60's), pop (everything from Micheal Jackson to the Black Eyed Peas) and of course love songs cause a guy needs to have some time when he cuddles his sweetie close to him, breathing in her wonderful scent and presence while we slowly spin around letting the music touch our hearts and drown out the world so all we can hear is each other's hearts beating as one and our breathing synchronizing.

Along with not stuttering or tripping over my own feet, I will have to squelch the urge to do a happy dance,( dancing like a maniac, cheering really loudly, raise my arms in victory, shake my booty, skip across the room) when Demi says "yes" which of course she will cause every girl likes going on a romantic date with someone who is their dream guy, or at least I hope and pray that I'm the man of Demi's dreams cause then it will make our relationship even stronger and better then it already is.

I had every inch of Demi and mine's date planned out, every detail from my complete outfit, what food I'm going to serve, the order of the music I will play for Demi and I to dance to, how dark the room should be to what flowers I will put on the table and give to Demi to keep.Now to write down exactly what I want to say in order to ask Demi out and then practice it so that it is grained into my subconscious, like my lines from "So Random", so that I'm saying it in my sleep and have no problem remembering every line as I go to the main even, the actual asking Demi out even if I start getting tongue tied around Demi.

I'm so freaking happy and excited to reach the next goal of showing Demi how much I love, adore and worship her and how we are perfect for each other; I can't wait for our date and it hasn't even been confirmed by my women yet cause I'm pretty sure that I have to ask Demi first before going on with the rest of my plan of the "Perfect Date" for my special angel. I feel like singing and it just turned out that mom and dad were watching 2007 classic "Hairspray" and the perfect song came on; "It Takes Two" which is a slow, jazzy ballad of a guy singing out his love to his sweetie which seemed to fit perfectly into how I was feeling.



"They say it's a man's world
Well, that cannot be denied
But what good's a man's world
Without a woman by his side
And so i will wait
Until that moment you decide"

Ok so I guess you can say that man " run" the world but only if you live in the 1940's where it seemed that all women were homemakers, taking care of the house and the children, not that there is nothing wrong with that, it's up to what the individuals think is best for themselves and their families's needs. I mean I have read that some men even take on the housework and the children as their wife is the breadwinner and I applaud them for their hardwork and not caring that others might think they aren't "manly". I know from my grandma, who had raised 5 children on my grandpa's salary of a plant worker which wasn't a lot of money but my mom, aunts and uncles had everything they needed to live on, raising a family and a household is a full time job, 24\7 that doesn't give you any vacation or breaks so I have new respect for all parents with children and a household cause I don't know how they do it.

Now both man and women work together to make the world unisex, there is no more "woman" and "man" only jobs, the world has woman doctors and men daycare providers and the people involved don't seem to have any problem with working side by side with the opposite sex, to them all the workers, no matter what gender, are their co-workers and they are working towards a common goal.

But like the song says, what good is building a better tommarrow for the next generations when you don't have someone to share the good and bad times that life brings? I want a woman, ok Demi if you want to be specific, in my life as my wife that I know in my deepest heart will stand by my side through good and hard times, like our arguements cause I know that even people who are madly in love still have disagreements cause if everybody in a relationship had the same opinions then the relationship would be super dull and probably won't last long, cause I know that our love is strong enough to last through anything, good or bad, that life brings us.

I want to be able to experience life's successes and disappointments with Demi, like either one of us gets an award for our immense talent like a Grammy so that we can sit in the audience and cheer our heads off for our love as they go onto stage to accept the award and then smother them with kisses and congradulations as we gush about how proud we are of our loves' accomplishments. Or even better, experience our wedding, sharing our love to the world by making a life-long committment to each other, the births of our children (hey I love kids and want them with my wife to love, cherish and raise to be the best people they can).

I want a women who will be a supportive shoulder and listening ear, just like I will be to her, when we are feeling down, like I feel that my career is at a standstill or Demi's talent is not being appreciated by others except for her loyal and devoted fans of course, or Demi is getting hate on the net or through mail cause since she has been in Hollywood she has had people openly express that they don't like her because of her gorgeous personality and her immense talent and even though most of the time Demi doesn't care what people say about her cause she knows that her true fans will support her and stand up for her against all hate but sometimes Demi has a weak moment just like everyone does at one point in their live and starts to believe the lies being said about her so I need to lovingly knock some sense into her and rebuild her confidence until she believes in herself again and I see that beautiful smile back on her face.

I also want a woman who I can bounce ideas off of and run suggestions by about all descions in our life, both major and minor, cause every descion affects her and our relationship and I want her to know that her opinion counts and that I want to hear what she has to say, whether it be good or bad, cause I like the idea of having a wife that says her mind and expresses her uptmost opinion. All in all I want my wife to not only be my soulmate and wife but also my best friend that I can still laugh with, talk to and have fun with just like when we were "just friends". I will wait until Demi decides that she wants to be that special woman in my life cause I can wait to be that special guy in her life.



"That i'm your man
And you're my girl
That i'm the sea
And you're the pearl
It takes two, baby,
It takes two"

I may be a huge movie star in the young adults category but I feel like I will be half the man I am now if I didn't have someone like Demi in my life. Demi makes me want to be the best man I can be, a sweet, caring towards everyone especially the individuals who are less fortunate then I am and to help them better their own life even if it's only by a margin, sensitive to everyone around him needs, make my family and friends a top priority in my life, not that they aren't already a top priority and a man that isn't afraid to be affectionate and loving towards the special woman in their lives and their family no matter if they are teased mercilessly about being a "wimp". She is my backbone, the jam to my peanut butter, the ying to my yang, my reason for getting up in the morning and trying my hardest during the day and she 's the pearl to my sea. When we are together, I feel like I can climb the highest mountain, can battle a grizzley bear, I feel like I can pretty much do anything I want and even if I don't succeed I know that in my Dem Dem's eyes, I'm her hero and the bravest guy ever lived and that makes me want to puff out my chest, my heart swell and my face break out in a million dollar smile all day.


"A king ain't a king
Without the pow'r behind the throne
A prince is a pauper. Babe,
Without a chick to call his own
So please, darling, choose me
I don't wanna rule alone
Tell me,"

I'm your king
And you're my queen
That no one else
Can come between
It takes two, baby,
It takes two "

It might not desperate but I enjoy having someone special in my life; the rush of emotions everytime the woman I am interested in is in my sight, wanting to do everything in my power within reason, cause I know that if I have to change myself to be someone I'm not then the girl isn't worth my love and time, to show them how I truly feel about them. Having a special someone in my life makes me feel warm inside like I have a furnace inside me and makes me feel taller then I am cause I have someone in my life that loves me for who I am.

This might sound selfish but I believe I'm the King of my own world, which makes sense cause I have always been told that I'm in charge of my own destiny and future by my parents so in a way I'm a King. And if I'm the King of my own world then Demi is most defiently my Queen, hmm Queen Demitria or even better Queen Demi. King Sterling and Queen Demi of a Kingdom Far Away where we will rule a Kingdom together equally with kindness and caring towards our subjects so that the people living in our Kingdom support, love and honor us because we don't lord over them,we are royals that actually respect their subjects and want to do everything in their power to make the lives of the people around them better and more fulfiled; to do something more important in their lives then just be eye candy.

All Demi has to do is just say that I'm her only man in her life just like she's the #1 girl in my lfe and we can start our own happily ever after that any woman would dream of cause I will try my hardest to be the Prince Charming that a woman like Demi deserves in her life. And once we are together as boyfriend and girlfriend, there ain't nobody that could tear us apart like the media with their totally untrue, made-up, twisted of the truth, rumor filled stories in order to damage Demi and mine's repuation as people and professionals that are destined to have our "fans" second guess Demi and me and have them stray away from being our loyal fans.

My friends and fans don't really understand why I'm still friends let alone am in love with (they say I'm obvious in how I feel for Demi; all someone has to do is look into my eyes and see my lovesick gaze directed at Demi and know that I'm head over heels in love with the "chick"") someone who has a "cooko-locco" breakdown over the smallest pieces of stress so I could be in serious danger if I hung around this kook and they feel Demi isn't worth my attention and time, um no it's Demi that isn't worthy of my love and attention; she's a goddess while I'm a unimportant mortals veying for her love. Plus they feel that Demi is using her disorder to make people feel sorry for her so they think that I should just lose her and her baggage and go out with the girls they feel are more "suitable" for me. Um no.

First of all, I did research on "bi-polar disorder" when Demi was first diagnosed so that I understood every inch of the disorder that had been plaguing my sweet angel all these years without anyone's knowledge; I want to know if there was anyway of being able to help Demi cope with day-to-day activities so that Demi could go on to live a normal, healthy and as much stress-free life as she could. Demi isn't a kook, she's a normal, young women dealing with a normal disorder that thousands of people have and live a normal life with only the people close to them knowing the pain they go through everyday.

Not only is Demi my one true love, she's also one of my best friend and there's no way that I'm in danger of getting hurt, other then Demi breaking my heart by not loving me as much as I love her and in the same way as me, by hanging out with her and plus best friends stick together through thick and thin and support and love that person no matter what they say and do so that is what I'm going to do with Demi until the end of time.

Lastly there's no way that Demi is at all using her disorder to benefit her own image and self, she had no idea that she had a disorder and since she found out about that she had the disorder she has been nothing but straighforward, the only reasons she has come forward with this personal demons of hers is so she can show her loyal fans that it's ok to have personal demons from horrible or tramatic experiences in their lives that they wish they could forget; the end result should be that they have to deal with those struggles that will only strengthen them to be stronger people and to let them know that no one is alone. Everybody has a strong support sysyem made up of family memebers, friends and trusted professionals in the society that individuals should tap into for the love and support that they need to deal with their problems and feel like a vlaued member of society and that they are in charge of their own lives.

People can say whatever they want about Demi, good or bad although I much prefer people gushing over my angel's many wonderful qualities that has made me fall madly,head over heels in love with her in the first place and why all of her fans love, adore and admire her for her works of charity and personality of humbleness, genuineness, love, wanting to use her own talents and gifts to make someone else, someone she might never met face to face, lives' better by letting them know that they are never alone in their own troubles or life's trials, they always have people to have their backs.

I don't care what people think of my love for Demi, my friends love to tease me that I'm such a sap and Demi's lapdog all she has to do is say" jump" and I ask "How high?", I know in my heart of hearts that what I feel for Demi is the true love that only happens once in a lifetime and what is read about in fairy tales coming true and plus I know that the people who are the most important to me, my family, love Demi almmost as much as me. My parents treat Demi like a daughter, my siblings think of her as a sister and my mom is always telling that true love doesn't wait for anybody and that it could leave my life anyday and I don't want to regret not taking the chance at real love for the rest of my life so could I please just tell Demi how much I love her before I lose her forever.

"Don't you know
Lancelot had guinevere
Mrs. Claus has old st. Nick
Romeo had Juliet
And liz, well, she has her dick"

Hopefully Demi and I go down into history of being one of the most unforgettable couples in history; the couple that all the young couples look up to as a reference of what true love and what a long, fulfilling, loving, true marriage looks like so that they can base their own relationships on being just as true and long lasting as Demi and mine's marriage that I hope one day will happen.

I want my marriage to Demi to be just like my parent's marriage; mom and dad have been married for 25 years and are still as much in love as when they were newelyweds starting out on their joined lives together as husband and wife. My parents' marriage is based on trust, committment, true love, companionship,shared interests and doing pretty much everything together from the housework to raising us kids, everything was shared 50\50.

"They say it takes two to tango
Well, that tango's child's play
So take me to the dance floor
And we'll twist the night away"

I adore and love dancing with Demi, whether it be fast or slow although I can't really dance fast, I pretty much move my arms in circles and move my hips in an ackward rythym that usually has nothing to do with the music that is playing. My feet don't even move they are glued to the floor cause I have no idea what to do with my body that doesn't make me look incredibly stupid and lame.

I love slow dancing with Demi, her small delicate hands around my neck so that she has to look deep into my eyes cause believe me I'm always looking for ways for me to be able to look deep into Demi's eyes just like I jumped on every chance I could get to kiss Demi, Demi and I actually practiced our kissing scene about 10,000 times cause it didn't seem to ever go perfect (ok so if you want to be technical, I pretended to screw up either leanned in too much or cut the kiss shorter then it must be, which is hard to do cause when mine and Demi's lips touched it was like the world stopped spinning and all I could hear was music playing in my ears, just so I could continue to kiss Demi in order to get the scene right :). I love when Demi and I slow danced I got to hold her small, delicate and fragile body in my arms and just move in tine with the tune our hearts were beating, together to the same rythym and leave the world behind just so that it's only Demi and me in our own love daze. I could slow dance with Demi for an entire night and never get bored; I enjoy anytime I can get with my girl, whether it was only a few moments or hours and whatever time I can get with Demi is filled into my "Demi" folder in my long term memory.

"Just like frankie avalon
Had his favorite mouseketeer
I dream of a lover, babe,
To say the things 1 long to hear
So come closer baby,
Oh and whisper in my ear "

Ok so this is gonna sound like something a girl would say or what would be written in a romance novel but somtimes I dream about holding Demi in my arms as we snuggle in each other's arms on our couch while we are either watching TV, read our seperate books, going over our scripts or just enjoying some much needed quality, quiet time alone without having to rush around to our different studios, mine the "So Radom" set ,which isn't the same without our "Sonny", all our friends dearly miss her on set each and every day and Demi to the music studio to keep working on her newest CD which I know will be filled to the brim with more personal songs that capture what trials and victories she has won over the past year and her feelings about what she has gone through that I already know will capture whoever hears her CD's hearts and touch their souls until they tear up when they hear it.

I can't wait to be able to hold Demi close to me and whisper sweet nothings, endearments and romantic and sweet sayings that hopefully will express the true depth of how much I love, cherish and adore her so that she is the only one who can hear what I'm saying; like a secret shared between just us that no one else can hear unless we let them and I don't think we will cause a couple needs to have some secrets that is just between us.

"Tell me you're my girl
And i'm your boy
That you're my pride
And i'm your joy
That i'm the sand
And you're the tide
and I'll be the groom
If you'll be my bride
It takes two, baby,
It takes two

It takes two, baby
It takes two..."

With holding the last note as long as I could, the song ended with me having a giant smile on my face. I could hear mom clapping and cheering as loud as she could from the kitchen; my mom must have heard my loud but hopefully soulful singing of this love song from my room and liked it. Hmm that gives me a new idea on how to ask Demi out, serenade her cause I know that music is Demi's life so why not. Now it's time to have a shower and get handsome for my girl. So wish me luck journal on getting the woman of my dreams. :)